Forgetting

I asked Sifu a question the other day about how not to feel guilty about not always doing the Challenges of the Week, forgetting how to be powerful in this situation. I have a lot of things I’m working on for my goals for the year (key phrase “working on”). I’m not 100% successful at making all my goals every single day yet, so adding something that is extra feels, well, extra. Sifu gave me a wonderful answer about priorities and remembering that it is okay to have my own priorities be more important for me.

Now, I know this through my work as a professional organizer and productivity coach, but in the moment, I’d forgotten.

This is not the only time I’ve forgotten something I know to be true and useful. I frequently forget to be in the moment or to surrender and let go of attachments. I’m prone to ask myself “Why does this happen?” Perhaps the more useful question is “What can I do about it?”

Remembering

Of course, I practice meditation daily, which is a constant reminder to let go of thoughts, worries and cares as I focus on the breath. There are other things that I find to be useful to remind myself to remain at cause, in a state of resourcefulness and connected with my Self.

My favorite is to keep my environment supporting me. This includes making my daily practices habits and keeping the people and activities in my life that help me be the best person I can be. It includes having people in my life who are not afraid to hold me accountable. It includes having books/video/podcasts available to me to draw on when I need reminding of my true self.

When I’m standing in my true self, the actions I take every day in pursuit of my goals seem like a foregone conclusion. There is no second guessing, no doubt that they either will or should happen. They just happen with effortless effort. And then, just like Mara visited with the Buddha and brought untold sufferings to him, something happens, and my true self is veiled from myself (again) and I appear to have forgotten a basic tenet or truth that my true self knows. Like I’ve forgotten how to make my priorities really my priorities, be true to myself, arrange my calendar so I have time to complete them and take those actions no matter what.

Anything is possible

As I get older, I wish I would be less accepting of forgetting my true self and do something about it earlier, before getting mired in the forgetting and the suffering that brings. And maybe I do respond more quickly, but I also seem to notice more places I have forgotten to be my true self. Interestingly, the more I realize what is not my true self, I am crystalizing what IS my true self, what that means to me and how to be that. I recognize my true self when I am loving, at peace and fully present. Then anything is possible.

Katherine Macey